I love this time of year because I get to see my family a lot. And this year I was fortunate enough to spend Thanksgiving in Florida and visit my grandma, 87 (my dad’s mom), and my nanny, 82 (my mom’s mom). I hadn’t seen either of them in a year or so. I had a wonderful time catching up and spending time with both of them, as well as my parents and my sister. I had just seen my parents and sister at Ironman Arizona, but I’m pretty sure they were very excited to hang out with me outside of a race, as I tend to get very stressed and be on edge at all times. I have a hard time relaxing as there’s so much to think about and double check, etc.
We went to a Packer bar on Anna Marie island, unfortunately the Packers lost both of those games. Not gonna lie, it’s tough to watch them right now, with all the injuries they have suffered this season. I just hope that we can finish out the season on a high note, and come back stronger next season. I spent a lot of time sleeping, relaxing, playing cards, watching movies, and just hanging out with the fam. Then on my last day in Florida we headed over to Tarpon Springs to visit my Nanny. We had such a lovely day.
Although the first three days I was in Florida the weather was subpar, mostly cold, windy, and a few storms here and there. So, when the sun finally came out, of course the first thing I wanted to do was head to the beach and play and walk. The beach is pretty much right outside my grandma’s condo, so I went with my sister once, my parents once, and just my mom once. I LOVE the beach and water. For some reason this type of environment soothes my soul, and puts my mind at ease. It’s as if nothing else matters in that moment when I’m there at the beach listening to the waves crash and just looking out into the open water.
After some beautiful memories in Florida, I took off to the DR, which is where I am now. I love how familiar everything feels here. I love exploring, and the unknown and learning about new things, but at the same time, there is something so heart warming when something feels familiar. Do you ever find that once the external feels familiar, that your mind starts to wander and now your starting to think about emotional unknowns or future unknowns. It’s like exploring and going on adventures is a way of experiencing life and finding out about one’s self – a journey – and yet is also a distraction from our mind.
My mind is always going, racing, turning, wondering, asking, thinking, wanting…I think that’s what I like about triathlon, because when I’m training, it keeps me focused, I rarely tune out, instead I zero in on how I’m feeling, constantly checking in on my body, thinking about hydration, nutrition, the route I’m on, making sure I don’t turn an ankle, or focusing on stride, turn over, rpms, etc.
It’s ironic that I love the unknown, yet the unknown scares me. I find that the unknown challenges me. Are you scared of the unknown? Do you hold back because of the unknown? I would definitely say that when it comes to the emotional unknown, especially for me, jobs and relationships, in the past, I’ve been terrified to jump, to leap, to follow the unknown. I’ve clung to something I feel like I can control, something that I felt was comfortable, easy. But, I was never happy, and ultimately it never turned out well. I think what’s the scariest part is even if you commit to something, you still have no idea if it will work out. I try to protect myself, but just as I challenge myself and I have no problem hopping into the unknown in triathlon, or going to a country I’ve never been to before, or trying an activity or sport for the first time, or going to camp when I was younger, etc, it’s exactly what I need to do in my career and relationship life. And so here I am, starting a new job next week, that is going to challenge me more than I’ve ever been challenged, but be amazing because it’s something that I’m so passionate about. I have never surrendered completely to a career, but I’m ready. I’m ready to give it everything I have, learn as much as I can, and be the best I can be in the social media realm.
This year has been a year of positive change and growth. The year before was a year of learning and healing. In the past, I have met people who might be a great fit for me, or at least worth exploring in a relationship, but I was too scared, would it work out? And now here I am in the Dominican Republic exploring the unknown, which terrifies me, but excites me at the same time. There are TONS of unknowns in this situation, and part of me wants answers, but part of me knows there are no answers, not yet anyway. Or if there are, maybe they aren’t ready to be revealed. So, here I am, my second time in the DR, and loving every second of it.
So, I ask you, what’s more rewarding? Feeling safe? Or challenging yourself to see what the unknown brings? Take that leap!